Tuesday, September 11, 2012

5 Unacceptable Tips

So while I am back waiting tables and searching for a new job, I thought I would share some things that not acceptable for tips. I've seen people leave everything for a tip at a restaurant. It's actually laughable what people think is okay to give a server. I mean first not all of us are knocked-up with three kids and deadbeat husband, nor are all of us working our way through college. Sadly the job market is piss-poor and even my master-degree having ass has trouble finding a job that pays the bills, but I'm the kind of girl that nothing is too good for me to do to keep a roof over my head.

But I am too good to get a shitty tip. So here are things that you should never leave as a tip:

 5. Lottery Tickets

Used or unused- these are not an acceptable tip. I've seen people leave both and frankly while its better than nothing its not really okay. I had a friend get two $2 dollar winning tickets for a tip, so theoretically he got a 4 dollar tip if he took them into a store and get the money but what mostly likely happened is that he lost them in his car.

4. Your Spare Change
From: http://15percent.tumblr.com/
 I get this all the time, especially from older women. It's like they just dumped out whatever leftover change they had in their coin purse and was like "that'll be enough." I once got a $1.84 for a tip in nothing but change. Now I have a coin jar I dump all these kinds of tips into, but I spend all day jingling until I get home. Its better than no tip but its still not really acceptable.

3. A Pretty Picture
I know, I know it's the thought that counts, but thought doesn't pay my rent. Plus what am I supposed to do with a picture drawn on a napkin? Even if I wanted to save it, take it home and frame it, there is no way it is going to make it through a waitressing shift without A). getting crumbled in my pocket or B). accidentally getting wet and destroyed. It's cute when you get a picture from a child under 8, its not cute when it comes from a 22 year old.

2. Verbal Tips

These kind of tips can go two ways. Sure they can be really nice and tell you how great of a job you did, at which case I ask them to tell the management because if I did such a great job then tell my boss and maybe I will get a raise or better shifts. Or it can be a verbal tip where the customer is an asshole and is like "get a real job." Excuse me asshole, does this not look like a real job to you? When did working in a restaurant because less of a real job than being a hairstylist or being a mechanic?

1. A Bible 

This is by far the worst tip you can receive and before you say "there is no way someone leaves that," oh yes they do and I personally have gotten them. I've also gotten several Jehovah Witness pamphlets for tips, which is even more lovely because I love being told I am going to hell after a hard day of work. The biggest problem with getting these as a tip is that they are so sanctimonious. A complete stranger, who knows nothing about me, decides that I need Jesus in my life. What if I go to church every Sunday? What if I'm Jewish? What if I spent three summers with Buddhist monks? How morally superior do you have to be to leave a complete stranger a bible? It's completely rude and also it makes me feel like a horrible person throwing it away. How do you throw away a bible without feeling like a horrible christian?
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