Confession: I Wanna Be Sedated

So time to make another confession to my lovely readers. I have an awful fear of flying.

I'm don't mean I just don't like doing it. I mean it brings me physical pain to be on an airplane. My face turns all pale and white and I look like i'm not breathing (cause i'm not). I clutch the armrests until my fingers are permenantly indented in them. I have had more than one passanger ask me if i'm going to throw-up/pass out/have a stroke during a flight.

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Anything You Want?

I confirmed recently something I think I've always known about me: At 2 am when I've been asleep I will promise a person anything to get them to leave me alone.

Let me set the scene for you. A couple nights ago a friend of mine was out drinking. Actually a bunch of friends of mine (separately) were out drinking and I was not with any them because:

1. I'm in the wrong city/state
2. I have boobs
3. I was knee-deep in thesis rewrites
4. I suck at life

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Most Wonderful Time of the Year

And no I am not talking about Christmas. I am talking about Spring, which i love for many reasons none of which have to do with my allergies. I love the warm weather. I love the fashion, anyone who has seen my legs understands why. I love the flowers in bloom. I love that my birthday is right around the corner. But mostly i love spring because that means Baseball Season is Back!

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Do You Know the Muffin Man?

Well I sure as hell don't know the muffin man. I do, however, know where the nearest Krispy Kreme Doughnut is (A. within walking distance of my apartment). But this is all beside the point, I have a baking problem.

I love to cook. I always have. Put me in a kitchen with a stove, some pots and pans and food and I will make something. And i will be quite happy doing so as long as i don't have to clean up later. So Friday night I was in the mood to bake. After 10 minutes of scrolling through allrecipes.com I found a recipe for Chocolate Chip Cream Cheese Muffins. Chocolate Chips and Cream Cheese, two of my favorite things ever? My mouth was salivating at the thought. 

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Blogoversary

So it is "Dancing's" two year anniversary. Two years ago today I started this blog, well actually i moved it from my Myspace. And lets be thankful for that because who uses Myspace anymore? You know besides tweeners trying to look cool and the pedophiles looking to score off them (Just teasing Myspace!).

Anyways, lots of things have changed in the past two years: I quit my job as a Bank Teller to go to graduate school, and not a moment too soon either I may have killed someone working at that bank. I adopted the two furry lovesof my life. I turned 25 (god i'm old!!). I've worked at 3 different jobs since bank telling. I dropped 20 pounds. My Yankees won the World series. I've kissed a few new boys and managed to not break my heart in the process. All in all its been a busy 2 years.

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Skankzilla

So over spring break, i went out to Charlotte for Ancient-Civ-Chick's bachelorette party. I assure you despite our crappy hotel (never, ever stay at the Residence Inn, Marriott in Downtown Charlotte- worst service ever) we managed to have a good time. One of ACC's friends works for a bar downtown and got us into basically any bar we wanted free. So between a fantastic dinner, 3 seperate clubs, one barfight, meeting a former Carolina Panther, watching ACC do a body shot, watching another friend get a lapdance (by not a cute old guy) and then a hilarious taxi ride back to our hotel- the crappy hotel service was overshadowed (heck we even got the cops called on us).

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Iz is not menace to soceities

Because my dogs are just too damn cute sometimes:

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TCM, I Love You!

I know I've posted before on my sheer love of old movies, but TCM outdid themselves last week. Ginger Roger is their star of the month. So last week they played all 10 of the Ginger Rogers/Fred Astaire movies.

I love these movies! I have seen Top Hat and Swing Time (my personal favorite) at least 5 times a piece. I've seen Follow the Fleet once or twice, but the other 7 movies have always eluded me. They just don't get played that often. So through the miracles of Tivo I managed to catch 9 of the 10. I missed the Gay Divorcee, but i will eventually catch it. So my week has been spent vegged out on my couch wishing studio's still made cinema like this. I mean when Fred and Ginger take the stage its magical. Nobody dances like they do, and studio's don't put pairs together like them anymore. They had it all: dancing, romance, comedy.

Don't believe me? See Hard to Handle from Roberta.

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Spring Awakenings

So UNC_Sis and I went to see Spring Awakening last Thursday in Durham. It's UNC_Sis's favorite musical and she bought me a ticket to go for Christmas (sneaky isn't she?). The Broadway touring cast was putting on performances for the last week, which is as close to Broadway as we can get

If you have never heard of the musical its about teenagers coming to terms with their sexuality in 1890's Germany. It's a pretty rated R musical. There is sex, masturbation, suicide, pregnancy, abortion, child abuse and other not so friendly things. But its a really good story and the music is fantastic (See the Tony Performance). It won 8 tony awards and the original cast included Lea Michele (or Rachel Berry from Glee).

Anyways, we knew what the musical was about but it was quite obvious that the two ladies sitting behind us had no idea. They apparently were season ticket holders and didn't know what they were in for. The little shocks and gasps, and comments made during intermission were hilarious. I mean there's a song called "My Junk" which is about masturbation and i don't think they were prepared for that. Even better was the parents with the 12 year old girl. But it was fantastic and I just want to listen to "Totally Fucked" like 20 more times.

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Closure of Sorts

So recently I got in touch with my ex-boyfriend. The one i don't talk about; the only I've ever loved and the one that broke my heart (even though i left him). He and I dated for 4 years, through all of my High school and for most of his. I broke up with him for a myriad of reasons but it was mostly because I changed and what I wanted changed and I was different. But when we broke up he said some really awful things to me. Things that I don't know I ever got over, and things for the last 7 years I have believed were true.

So when I started talking to him it was cordial at first, but you know how these things go, it eventually devolved into talking about the breakup. And he didn't remember the things he said, which was hard for me to understand because they have been etched into my brain. So when I finally told him, he was kind of shocked. He didn't remember saying them and he had been drunk a lot after the breakup, and he didn't mean them.

For me this was hard to deal with. Here I've been hanging onto something someone said 7 years ago, when he forget the day after he said them. But its sort of been nice to have that kind of closure and understanding because now I don't think those things about me either. Whats funny about all this is that even after he said all those nasty things to me I still wanted him to be happy. I loved him for 4 years and yeah we didn't work out and if he needed to say all those things to me to get closure and to move on and be happy with someone else than I was willing to hear them.

Because the funny thing about love is that it doesn't go away. I still care about all of the guys I dated (even though none of them worked out) and want them all to be happy. I want them all to move on and find people that they can love and be with and have a life with. I don't want them to wallow over me, or be angry; They deserve to be happy. That's what I wanted for them when we were together and that's what I want for them when we aren't together. Life is too short to hold grudges or anger or to be miserable over a failed relationship. We tried, it didn't work out, move on and be happy somewhere else. Because that's what i want for me too.

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Adventures in Babysitting

So Baby Sis was born over the weekend (Friday morning to be exact) and pictures and gushing to come. But first, Lil' Miss Sis couldn't come to the hospital; she was sick and the hospital in question wasn't allowing visitors under age 18 anyways (swine flu reasons). So my stepdad, UNC_Sis and myself were taking shifts babysitting her.

Now before we begin, you have to understand Lil' Miss Sis is Autistic. She's a high functioning Autistic; she does everything a normal 3 year old does except talk. She babbles and tries to say words but they typically don't sound like what they should. So my family has a series of sign language (but not the official sign language) to talk to her. My mom knows her quirks, i know some of them.

So during Saturday's shift of babysitting Lil' Miss Sis, she was sitting on my lap and watching cartoons and fell asleep on me. She was asleep about 15-20 minutes and i thought i should move her to her bed since UNC_Sis was due to come home soon and i didn't want the barking dogs to wake her (my parent's dog and Nixon). So i get her to bed and she promptly wakes up and has a total meltdown on me. Lil' Miss Sis is cranky when she doesn't get enough sleep, but this was compounded by my mom and stepdad not being there. So i finally get her quieted down and back to sleep for about 10 minutes when the phone rings and i try to get out of the bed to get it. BIG MISTAKE! She wakes back up and has a worse meltdown and i trying to get her back to sleep when the phone rings again and i have to get up and get it.


Its my mom wanting to know how she's doing and I'm aggravated at her for waking up Lil Miss Sis. During this Lil' Miss Sis keeps waving at the floor of her bedroom and yelling at me and i have no idea what she wants. So finally i yell into the phone "SHE KEEPS WAVING AT THE FLOOR, WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!"

To which my mother answers "she wants to watch the Backyardigans (Lil Miss Sis's fav tv show)."

"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT!"

Which was answered by hearing everyone in the hospital room laughing, because how would any of them known that?

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