Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Project Runway: Office Tramp on Line 1 (8.2)

 So episode 2 of Project Runway and yet again i disagree with the judges on just about everything. I mean did they all get lobotomies after season 6? No woman would wear some of the shit they love. I mean seriously Gretchen's denim jumpsuit that ends at the ankle? That's going to make 99% of women look fat and make everyone look like they have cankles.

But i am jumping way ahead of myself again.

Challenge: The challenge for this episode was create a look that defines the Marie Claire woman and it will be featured on a billboard in Times Square. This is another one corn husk dress out of five. There was nothing hard about this challenge at all.

And then the contestants divided into three groups for me:

1. Designers who cannot dress themselves- I'm sorry i cannot take designers seriously when it looks like they had their clothes picked out by a blind man. Let start with Mondo- Okay you cannot pull off a bow-tie, a biker hat and suspenders all in one outfit. Leave the bow-ties for Tucker Carlson. The later i saw him in this v-neck yellow piping with black and white stripes vesty- thing. It was hideous no matter what it was. Then there was A.J. who looked like a catholic school boy who moonlighted as boat captain on the side. If you can't afford a boat you cannot afford a captains hat either. Then there was Peach "I like bright color" who was wearing black, black and more black. Sweetie you aren't going to a funeral.

2. The please shut up nows- This group included Ivy whose tone of voice could make cats wail. Valerie who word vomits while she designs, and Casanova who fakes not knowing English.

3. Everyone else- Because you don't piss me off yet

Moving on, I thought the judges got everything all wrong. Gretchen's denim jumpsuit with ankle boots was atrocious and no girl with boobs bigger than a A-cup could wear it. Valerie's red dress was cute but i thought it was way too short for her "it's good to wear to work. She could be a lawyer." In fact i found hers, Michael C., Michael D. and A.J's dresses all to be way way to short for any respectable girl to wear into an office. I'm sorry office tramp on line 1. Jason's dress looked like he cut apart a satin garbage bag and pinned it together. Whereas Kristen's outfit looked like it was going to eat her model. Then there were just a dresses i found to be really blah, boring and unmemorable.

However, I loved loved loved Andy's pants and shirt combo. Those pants were fantastic and made the model's legs look 8 miles long. I thought the sleeves on the shirt were a little gimmicky, but i would have totally rocked that outfit, and i could see a million other girls wearing it too. Mondo's outfit too was adorable for someone who works in fashion or art. I'm not sure i could see a office assistant wearing it, but still totally cute and appropriate. I didn't love Nicholas' cape thingy (i mean really capes are so Sherlock Holmes 1889) but i didn't think the skirt and top under it weren't that bad. I could see people buying them. But then what do i know?

Winner: Gretchen

Out: Jason and Nicholas
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