Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Whats It Going To Take!

So at the beginning of May, I graduated with my Masters in European History. It is now almost August and i still do not have a job.

AND IT IS DRIVING ME MOTHERFUCKING CRAZY.

Seriously, I am not the kind of person who doesn't like having nothing to do. So sitting at home all day with my mom, two little sister, and three dogs is enough to make me want to commit suicide (except then my puppies would be sold to the nearest Chinese food restaurant).

I won't lie, i am not handling this well at all. I have put out probably applied to a hundred jobs and stripping gigs. I have had 4 job interviews, FOUR, and thus far none of them have hired me. Before this I had a record of getting four out of every 6 jobs i interviewed for. Now I'm at four out of ten jobs I've interviewed for. THIS.IS.KILLING.MY.NUMBERS. What is it going to take to get me hired? Do i need to start showing more cleavage on interviews? Do i need to start offering BJ's to the hiring directors? I mean I have a masters degree and a pretty good resume. I don't know where i am going wrong (besides not shaking my assets at the interviews)

In fairness, one of the jobs i interviewed for had 500 applicants and they only interviewed about 10 of us. So I guess I should be impressed I got interviewed at all. I know its a numbers game, and that there is an over glut of people applying for jobs right now and I'm just tossed into that mix. But patience is not a virtue I'm all that great with. I need to be doing something- anything.

I can't sit at home feeding my dogs jellybeans for much longer. I mean i get excited when my parents send me on runs to Food Lion because that means i get to leave the house and have some privacy for like 10 minutes. If it wasn't like 900 degrees outside I would move into my car.

So does anyone need a live-in stripper-chef-maid-dog walker-make out buddy? I have excellent references.
All of these stories are mine except the ones that aren't. Pictures are property of their creators. Powered by Blogger.