So I love my friends. I would do anything for them, willing to go along with their crazy plans, and would bail them out of jail (if i didn't end up in jail alongside them). But seriously, they are way too concerned with my love life. Technically it is the lack thereof. G-Fab doesn't really meddle too much because he doesn't know that many straight men anyways. My other BFF, Songbird, is too busy dealing with her own love life to bother with mine. Guys like throw themselves all over her and she is just too nice and too great to have it ever be a problem. Ancient Civ Chick (ACC), on the other hand, has been in a serious relationship for like ever. Somewhere along the line she has taken it upon herself to want to find me a boyfriend.
While i love her for wanting to help me, I would have to want to help me for this to work. I'm just not concerned with my love life, at all. I'm in graduate school, i have friends who i can rely on, i have my family to make me crazy, and i have my dog to fawn all over; Why do i need to add dating to that mix? Yes, there is a part of me who would like a boyfriend (mostly cause i really miss sex) but not enough to actually work for it. I'm not hideously grotesque, over 500 pounds, or criminally insane; I am capable of finding a boyfriend on my own. I just sort of don't.
So the other night ACC decided she was going to make me a match.com account (i don't actually think she will do this) because she watched 5 episodes of Millionaire Matchmaker and decided i was better than all those girls (because i'm not a money-grubbing whore). How that translated into a match.com account i have no idea. Then G-Fab wanted in on the action and is now going to help her write my profile. I love the fact that they want to help me (even though they threaten this shit all the time and never follow through) but i don't understand why. I think ACC is living vicariously through me because she hasn't dated in 7 years. I guess i don't get the appeal of trying to get someone else a boyfriend. *shrugs* I always was a strange girl. But if it makes them happy, I am willing to let them go about doing it. It's not like i actually have to go out with these guys right?
Why do i feel like I'm having a lady doth protest too much moment?...
So some of you might remember awhile back i was looking to get a dog. While I did eventually find a dog that suited my requirements and well my apartment complex's requirements. I ended up adopting a 3 year old Border Terrier from the Humane Society not far from where i live. Now I'm pretty sure this is a no Kill Shelter and this dog is adorable, so there was little chance he would have been put down; so feel free not to tell me how i saved this dogs life. Anyways, I named the rascally little fella Nixon. Yes, Nixon after the president. I realize that many people don't have good connotations of the name but i wanted some sort of Historical name (since i am a Historian) and to be fair Nixon wasn't a half-bad president. He just got caught being stupid, which is the curse of being a president. The name fits the dog too, because i am always catching him doing something he shouldn't be doing.
The problem with Nixon is that the humane soceity said he came in as a stray. So he either was a stray or the people who had him before me left him outside because he has no house-manners whatsoever. I've had him less than a month and he still hasn't gotten potty training down (yes, i'm crate training him. He just doesn't seem to care). The problem with Nixon and Me is well, Me. The dog isn't bad; he just doesn't know better. And i am a sucker from his sad little brown eyes and give in alot. He's come along nicely though. He knows sit and lay down and he's trained to sit before i will throw his ball. My problems have been house training him and teaching him not to nip me.
The nipping is problematic. He's pretty good about not doing it unless i'm sitting down. Then he doesn't seem to stop. And i have tried everything to get through to him. I tried yelling "ouch" and leaving. I tried spraying him with a water bottle. I tried popping his nose. So far all three methods just get the same reaction: He gets high strung and starts barking and nipping at me more. Last night i got so fed up, I seriously contemplated muzzling him. But I hate to do that to my baby, and i know the problem isn't him, its me. Plus he was so good last night after he settled down I let him sleep with me (which i never do) and he didn't nip me or wake me once. So i just have to find a method to get through to my dog with.
When we last left our heroes: They had dealt with a smug man in Gettysburg, saw great license plates for Failblog and G-Fab had a happy meal, which actually did make him happy. So we left Gettysburg and continued our roadtrip to G-Fab's college. At this point it was getting late and we had been on the road for nearly 10 hours, which is entirely too long to be in car. So we stopped at 7 in Harrisburg, PA for dinner, where G-Fab and I played our favorite game: Rate the Guys. We tend to do this at every restuarant we go to because A. we're whores (no, not really) and B. because it passes the time. Now i should note that G-Fab and I don't think we are particularly attractive, not to say that we are ugly, but neither of us are models (we're not 10's). So when we do this it is not because we have some huge Egos and think we are the hottest shit in the buildings, nor do we have fun tearing apart other people. We typically do this to see how far apart our attraction levels are (and they are quite far apart), plus in a perfect world maybe one day I'll take a guy home because of this system. I chose one of the workers behind the counter, who G-Fab said looked like Morgan from Chuck (see picture) except taller. And G-Fab chose another worker who reminded me of the friend from Ferris Buller.
The highlight of dinner was the waitress asking where we were from, and then me totally freaking out when she knew of the town my parents live in (which is where i tell people i'm from even though i'm not really from anywhere). For the record i freak out when people in NC know the that town because its seriously like a two stop-light town in the middle of no-where. The waitress got an extra large tip for that (well extra large for a 21 dollar check). And we got back on the road again. The rest of the trip really ins't that interesting unless you want to hear about G-Fab's adorable yet incredibly-needy sort-of boyfreind or my ears popping and the altitude sickness i was getting from going up and down mountains. It was my first trip to the mountains ever. We arrived safely at G-Fab's around 9ish, where we promptly passed out. And we spent the entire next two days watching the first season of the Tudors (hey, i am a history chick).
MEMORABLE QUOTES: 6:58-[G-Fab]: He's too fabulous to contain in one body.
9:00- [C.Rose]: Is it sad my New Years Resolution is to get laid?
When we last left our heroes: Rose and G-Fab were on their way to PA after stopping at a really scary gas station. So we hit the road again and drove through VA. Know i've been through Virginia dozens of times and its a pretty state but much like NC it's basically all trees. So there isn't a whole lot of interesting things we saw. Around 1:30ish, we stopped for lunch at McDonald's where we found this painted on the wall. Now I've never seen an amputated hamburgler before, but i'm assuming they exist. What struck G-Fab and I as particularly odd was that he is skateboarding. Now i imagine that is rather hard to do on with one leg and on your knees. If anyone out there who reads my blog (the whole 4 people) have ever seen an amputee skateboarding or know how they would do it, please explain it to me.
Anyways, after G-Fab finished his happy meal, we were back on the road. Yes, a grown man eating a happy meal is a little odd but he got a toy venom (from spiderman) and it became the mascot for our trip. I'd love to tell you we saw some really interesting things but we didn't. We mostly saw traffic in and around DC. I tried to take a picture of the back up but it didn't come out too well. The most interesting things we saw was licenses plates on a couple cars. First was the hummer with the plate stating "Poetry." That's ironic in itself but the second car was better. G-Fab tried to get us close enough to take a picture for FailBlog but we never managed to. Anyways it was a plate with one of those little wheelchair/disabled pictures with the letters stating "surfer boy." Now really, i have a hard time imagining those two things together. Much like the amputee hamburgler, I have to wonder how a disabled person is surfing. Around 5:30 we hit Gettysburg where we were accosted by an employee who doesn't understand that tour guides are not always necessary (Full Story Here).
MEMORABLE QUOTES: 3:19-[G-Fab]: Oh No! The Titanic is sinking
So Spring Break fell on the same week for me and my best friend G-Fab (Otherwise known as Geoff the Fabulous), so he came down to NC to visit his family and picked me up to drive back to PA with him. So G-Fab and i meet in undergrad and we were basically Best Friends from the moment we met, and even though we go to grad school 4 states away, we're still basically inseparable. In fact G-Fab made the comment that even though we haven't seen each other since Christmas, it was like we picked up just where we left off. So we left my parents house at 8:30 AM (where i left my dog and car) and hit the road for PA. We stopped at Bojangles (see our cups) because G-Fab can't get good sweet tea in PA. I myself am not really a fan of sweet tea. Somewhere around 10:30 G-Fab realized i was not really coherent because i was talking to a recent conference i went to and instead of saying presenter, i managed to say "presantator" and he proceeded to make fun of me.
So around 11 we stumbled into Newton's Grove and managed to find the scariest gas station ever; where the first pump tried to rip us off and we were going to leave but the manager came out and we didn't have to heart to be mean to him. Even though we thought we might get buried by an avalanche of used tires stacked up next to us. But we made it out alive and continued in our quest to PA.
MEMORABLE QUOTES: (In no particular context)
11:00-[G-Fab, reading the sign]: Newton's Grove; The Circle of Opportunity 11:01-[C.Rose]: Because whitey can't keep us down here.
12:00-[C.Rose]: You have a soul, it's just a little one.
So anyone who knows me knows that i am a huge fan of Fall Out Boy. Mock me for Emo music, fine. But the are legitimately a good band, even if some of their songs make no sense. Actually you can make sense of most of them if you can read between the lines and make connections. There is this song Tiffany Blews, which i didn't get until i realized it all came back to Audrey Hepburn (Tiffany= Breakfast at Tiffanys, Roman Candle= Roman Holiday, Little Black Dress= Classic Hepburn). I had that light bulb over the head moment with that song title too.
Anyways i've seen the band in concert once already with a bunch of freinds and I'm going to see them again in April with my sisters. Anyways one of the reasons I'm such a huge fan is that they have a wicked sense of humor. They are the kind of band that isn't afraid to make fun of themselves. So I was looking at their Concert Tour info because i heard one of the opening acts i want to see isn't going to be at my show, and i stumbled upon their blog and found this: Fall Out Boy Trail
For those of you who didn't grow up in the early 1990's, this is a mock of the very popular game Oregon trail; where you got a group of travelers, bought food and supplies and set off on the Oregon trail back during the migration west. Along the way you'd go hunting, ford rivers, and get attacked by Indians all while trying to keep you. I played this game alot growing up and what Fall Out Boy did was update the game to match their touring life. Basically you get the band and food (McNuggets) and travel across the country on tour playing gigs (you actually do play the music ala guitar hero), partying, and trying not to get attacked by zombies. It's the kind of throwback fun that only FOB could pull off. And it took me all of 15 minutes to kill the band in my first game.
So the second series in my Cartoon Nostalgia series is Tiny Toons.If you missed this show you missed some of the best cartoons of the 90's. It actually won several daytime Emmys. Headed up by Steven Spielberg, the show was basically the idea that all the original Looney Tunes characters run a high school and this is the second generation. Buster and Babs Bunny are the central characters and the are both reincarnations of Bugs Bunny; Pluck Duck takes the role of Daffy Duck; Fifi La Fume takes the role of Pepe Le Pew; and so on. The best part of this show was that they basically took the original Looney Tunes everyone loved and reinvented them for the modern age.
This cartoon still lives in my household. One of the characters a precocious red-head girl named Elmyra Duff, who loved animals. She was always trying to catch them and when she got them, she would hug and squeeze them until their eyeballs popped out and they were clawing to get away from her. My younger sister had a bad habit of wanting to love and hug on our pets when she was a child and it didn't work so well. She has been bitten and clawed more than any other member of our family; so we called her Elmyra, forever. Even now when she picks up an animal and trys to love on it we call her Elmyra and she's legal to vote. Anyways one of the funniest shows from when i was a kid. It inspired a movie and several video games; in fact one summer my cousin and I tried to beat the Tiny Toon Game for Sega (Yes, i had a sega) everyday for like 2 months. We got to the final level but we could never beat Elmyra (It still haunts me). Anyways i encourage you to find it on Youtube. If anyone can find the video of Baby Pluck duck flushing things down the toilet, it would be greatly appreciated; My mom and i have been trying to find it for months to show my stepdad.
The sexiest redheaded, tattooed, New York Yankees-loving, terrier-owning, concert junkie, neurotic Historian ever!
My life is strange, my family is insane, and I'm just chronicling my wild ride.
